Understand That Life Is Like a Dream, and Treat Yourself and Other People Well



When you clearly understand that your own clingings and the things you cling to are all capriciously changing, and none of them can last forever, your mind will naturally relax, and relax again, and finally you will be as comfortable and pleased as if you are lying on the green grass in the warm sun. Then you will not feel that you are living such a fatiguing life, and you will be able to face this world and the things you go through, calmly taking things as the come. Then you will finally be truly solid and unbreakable.

处于空寂明朗中的时候,你会发现,什么样的经历都会过去。一旦过去,一切就仅仅是回忆。如果你执著于某个痛苦经历,回忆就延续了它对你的伤害;如果你不在乎它,它就不过是梦幻泡影,与一些使你愉悦的经历没有任何本质上的区别。它们只是你人生路上的若干片段,稍纵即逝,共同构成了你生命的痕迹与证据。

When you are in the state of empty, still clarity, you will discover that all kinds of experiences pass. Once they pass, they are all just recollections. If you cling to a certain painful experience, your recollection will prolong the harm it did to you. If you do not concern yourself with it, then it is no more than a dream, an illusion, a bubble, without any substantive difference from the experiences that made you happy. These are just some fragments on your road of life, transient and fleeting, and together they form traces and evidence of your life.

所以说,执著于个人得失的人,总是比无私的人更容易产生烦恼和痛苦,因为他们总有太多的欲望得不到满足,他们在乎别人对自己的看法,在乎世界对自己的态度,在乎自己的付出有没有回报。他们总是牢牢抓住太多虚幻的现象不肯放手,总是以为这是一种精明和清醒,不屑于反思它会不会是另外的一种谬误。但是他们不明白,痛苦的来源正是这许许多多的在乎与精明。看不透这一点的他们,当然不是真正清醒的人,也不是真正爱自己的人,更不可能懂得如何去爱他人。他们也许能获得很多世俗的成就,也许不能,但可以肯定的是,精于计较的他们一定活得很累。

Thus we say that people who cling to personal gains and losses will always generate afflictions and sufferings more easily that people who are unselfish. This is because they always have too many desires and cannot satisfythem. They care about how other people see them, and they care about the world’s attitude towards them. They care about whether or not they will get paid back for the efforts they expend. They always hold tight to too many empty illusory forms, and are unwilling to let go of them. They always think that this is a way of being shrewd and lucid, and they do not think it is worth reflecting on whether this may be another kind of fallacy. But they do not understand that the source of pain and suffering is precisely all this concern and this shrewdness. Since they cannot see through this, of course they are not really people who are lucid, and they are not people who really love themselves, nor can they understand how to love others. They may manage to achieve much worldly success, or they may not, but what is certain is that, adept in calculating as they are, they are sure to lead very fatiguing lives.

要想解决烦恼,或者不生烦恼,就要记住,当世上的诸多存在显现于你的心性中时,你的真心要永远灵敏明朗,不要昏昧糊涂。就是说,在面对世界的时候,你必须时刻保持宁静与清醒,注意观察内心的每一个念头,不要让纷繁变化的事物把你的心牵走,不要放纵自己沉浸在某种情绪当中,更不要昏昏沉沉,一点反应都没有。这时,你才不会被概念、经验、欲望和偏见等妄念所左右。

If you want to resolve afflictions, or not give rise to afflictions, then you must remember that when all the entities in the world are appearing in your mind’s nature, your true mind must be forever sensitive and clear, and must not become dimmed and muddled. That means that when you are facing the world, you must constantly maintain tranquility and lucid awareness, and focus on and observe every thought of the inner mind. Do not let things with their many complex changes drag your mind off. Do not let yourself go and sink down into certain emotions. Do not fall into oblivion, so there is no responsiveness at all. Only then will you no longer be controlled by false thoughts like concepts, experiences, desires, biased perceptions, and so on.

当然,道理说起来很简单,但真正能够做到的人却相当少。真正能够控制自己的心、接受无常、明白世界的幻化、进而不被妄念所左右的人,才是真正的智者。只有真正的智者,才能善待自己,善待别人。

Of course, this is simple to describe in principle, but relatively few people can truly manage to do this. People who can truly control their own minds, accept impermanence, clearly understand the world’s illusory transformations, and not be controlled by false thoughts – only these are the genuine people of wisdom. Only the genuine people of wisdom can treat themselves well and treat other people well.

“善待自己,善待别人”跟“学会爱自己,才能懂得爱别人”是同一个意思吗?是,也不是。善待就是一种爱,因为心中有了爱与慈悲,你才能真正善待自己与他人,从这个角度上来说,是。但为何又不是呢?因为“爱”是一个非常容易被误解的字眼。

“Treat yourself well and treat other people well” and “Only when you learn how to love yourself will you be able to understand how to love other people” – do these mean the same thing? They do, and they don’t. Treating people well is a kind of love, because only when you have love and compassion in your mind will you be able to genuinely treat yourself and other people well. So from this perspective, the two statements do mean the same thing. So why is it also true that in a sense they do not mean the same thing? Because “love” is a word that is very easily misinterpreted.

什么才是真正的“爱自己”?说自己想说的话,买自己想买的东西,做自己想做的事情,忠于自己哪怕是错误的想法与观点,这就是爱自己吗?对一些人来说,这或许就是爱,但这是一种以自我为中心的爱。这种所谓的爱是非常自私的,本质上说,它仅仅是一种强烈的欲望。信奉这种爱的人,永远都会以小我作为衡量的坐标:我得到了什么?我失去了什么?我得不到什么?这个世界让我满意了吗?我是不是会感到失望?我会不会感到孤单与失落?矛盾的是,资源是有限的,有人获得,就有人不能获得,如果永远都以满足自我为目标,发生利益冲突的时候,你还能真心地爱别人吗?遭遇挫折甚至磨难的时候,你愤愤不平、充满烦恼,这是真心地爱自己吗?如果以这种方式去爱,你就不可能真心地爱别人。比如说,有人称赞你、对你微笑的时候,你肯定能用友好的态度来回应他,但是假如他当众驳斥了你的观点、对你的工作成果不以为然,甚至对你进行侮辱,你又将如何呢?你还爱他吗?——当然,我说的爱,更多的是一种大爱,而不是男女之间的情爱。

What is it to genuinely “love oneself”? To say what you want to say, to buy the things you want to buy, to do the things you want to do, to be faithful to your own opinions and viewpoints no matter how wrong they are – is this loving yourself? For some people, this may be what love is, but this is a self-centered love. This kind of so-called love is very selfish, and as for its basic substance, it is just a kind of strong desire. People who believe in this kind of love will always use the petty self as the criterion for assessing things: What will I gain? What will I lose? What can’t I get? Will this world satisfy me? Will I feel despair or not? Will I feel isolation and loss or not? The contradiction is that resources are limited: if someone gets something, then someone cannot get it. If you always take satisfying yourself as the criterion, when conflicts of interest arise, will you be able to genuinely love someone else? When you encounter setbacks or even problems, you will feel resentful and full of affliction: is this genuinely loving yourself? If you try to love in this manner, it will be impossible for you to genuinely love other people. For example, when someone praises you or smiles at you, you will certainly be able to respond to that person with a friendly attitude. But if another person refutes your point of view in a group meeting, and does not think the results of your work are right, and even slanders you, then how will you act? Will you still love him? Of course, the love I am speaking of now is more a kind of great love, and not the emotional love between men and women.

所以说,假如我们不能以接受“获得”的心态来面对“失去”,就难免会纠缠于恐惧、失落、孤单等负面情绪,陷入虚幻的痛苦当中。有的人走不出痛苦的阴影,就会自杀,或者以暴力的手段对世界进行抗议和报复。可是,无论出于什么原因,施暴者最终总会品尝他亲手种下的恶果,等待他们的,仍然会是无穷无尽的痛苦。这种痛苦是外部世界强加在我们身上的吗?不是的,外部世界发生的种种事情都是由多种条件组合产生的结果,它们本身并不是固定不变的,因此也不存在什么固定的属性,包括我们对人和事物的看法及感受。

Thus it is said that if we are unable to face “loss” with the state of mind of accepting “gain,” then it will be hard to avoid being tied up in negative emotions like fear, a sense of loss, a sense of isolation, and so on, and fall into empty illusory pain and suffering. Some people cannot get out of the shadow of pain and suffering, and so they kill themselves, or they use violent means to protest against the world or get revenge. But no matter what basic cause it comes from, those who commit violence ultimately will taste the evil fruit which they have planted the seeds of with their own hands, and what is awaiting them is still endless pain and suffering. Is this pain and suffering something that the external world imposes on us? It is not. The various kinds of things that the external world gives rise to are all the results produced by the coming together of many conditions, and they themselves are not fixed and unchanging. Because of this, no fixed attributes exist either, including our views and feelings toward people and things.

世上一切和各种显现,都是先作用于我们的心,再由我们的心显现出来的,我称之为“万有心性显”。也就是说,眼、耳、鼻、舌、身、意感受色、身、香、味、触、法,然后生成眼识、耳识、鼻识、舌识、身识、意识,这六种信息组成了我们对世界的所有感知与判断。换句话说,我们对世界的认知,是由所见、所闻、所嗅、所尝、所触、所想组成的。其中,眼耳鼻舌身意被称为“根”,因为它们像植物的根部一样,能“生”出东西,不过它们“生”出来的东西是肉眼不可见的,是一种信息。这种信息被称为“识”,根据其对应的“根”的不同,又被分为眼识、耳识、鼻识、舌识、身识、意识六类。“根”所感受、思维的对象,叫做“境”,它会刺激我们的心灵,使我们产生欲望,染污我们的本初清净,所以它又叫“尘”。它涵括了外部世界的一切人事物与所有现象,被分为色声香味触法,分别由眼耳鼻舌身意所感知。

Everything in the world, and all that appears, first affects our minds, and then what appears from our minds we term “the myriad forms of being are manifestations of the nature of mind.” This means that the eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body, and conceptual mind perceive forms, sounds, smells, flavors, touches, and conceptualized phenomena, and then give rise to the visual consciousness, the auditory consciousness, the olfactory consciousness, the tongue consciousness, the body consciousness, and the conceptual consciousness. These six kinds of information form all our perceptions and judgments toward the world. In other words, our consciousness of the world is formed from what we see, what we hear, what we smell, what we taste, what we touch, and what we think. In this, the eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body, and conceptual mind are called “faculties,” [in Buddhist Chinese, rendered by the word “roots”] because they are like the roots of a plant, from which things can “grow forth.” However, the things they put forth are not visible to the physical eyes, but are rather a kind of information. This kind of information is termed “consciousness,” and it is not the same as the corresponding “root” on which it is based, and this is classified into six categories: the visual consciousness, the auditory consciousness, the olfactory consciousness, the tongue consciousness, the body consciousness, and the conceptual consciousness. The objects that the sense faculties perceive and think about are called “the sense objects.” They can stimulate our minds and spirits, and make us produce desires, and defile our original purity, and so they are also called “the dusts.” These include all the people and things of the external world and all apparent forms, and they are classified as forms, sounds, smells, flavors, touches, and conceptualized phenomena, distinguished by what is perceived by the eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body, and conceptual mind.

可见,我们对世界的所有看法与感受,实际上都是妄心。那妄心,就是你的六根、六识和外部世界合而为一所产生的结果。比如,你的眼睛看到了一个女孩子,觉得她很漂亮,就生起了妄心,想让她做你的女朋友,这就是眼根、眼识和外尘发生作用的结果。心的不同决定了识的内容,而且外尘本身也是善变的,所以这个结果也在不断变化。以是缘故,我常说“心变则世界变”。

It is evident that all the ways we look at and perceive the world are in reality false states of mind. That false mind is the result produced by your six sense faculties and six sense consciousness coming together as one with the external world. For example, your eyes see a woman, and you feel she is very pretty, and this give rise to the false mind, and you want to make her your girlfriend. This is the result of the functioning of the sense faculty of the eye, and the visual consciousness, and external sense objects. Differences in the mind determine the content of consciousness, and external sense objects themselves are changeable, so this result is constantly changing. For this reason, I always say that “when the mind changes, then the world changes.”

我举个简单的例子:当一个男子执著于世俗情感时,可能会对一个女孩一见倾心,然后放下梦想,放下一切去追求她。如果有一天,他的心变成琼波浪觉(注:他是伟大的上师与文化大师,也是我的小说《无死的金刚心》中的主人公,他放下了一切去追求真理,后来把自己找到的真理与教法都带回了雪域,他在佛学文化传播史上起到了不容忽视的作用)的心,他就会觉得女子的美丽远远没有他的大愿、他人生的方向重要,这时他就会放下对女子的牵挂与执著,继续自己对梦想的追求。

I will give a simple example. When a young man clings to and is attached to conventional worldly sentiments, he may fall in love with a young woman at first sight, then abandon his dreams, and abandon everything to pursue her.

One day he may go through an experience like Khyungpo Naljor, the great teaching master and cultural master who is the protagonist of my novel The Deathless Diamond Mind. Khyungpo Naljor gave up everything and went off to India in a quest for truth; later he brought the truth and the teachings that he had found back to his homeland, the snowy regions of Tibet. He carried out a role in the history of the transmission of Buddhist culture that cannot be overlooked.

The young man in the example now feels that the woman’s beauty is far less important than he great aspiration and his direction in life, and so then he gives up his worries about and attachments to the woman, and continues his quest for his dreams.

如果你明白了这一点,心上的包袱自然会慢慢减少,因为你会发现,就连那些所谓的包袱,也是虚幻的。它们能折腾你,完全是因为你把它们看得非常实在。当你明白自己的执著与执著之物都是善变的、都不会永恒的时候,你的心自然会放松下来,再放松一点,最后像躺在暖阳下的青草地上般的舒适与惬意,你就不会觉得自己活得很累,也能任运坦然地面对这个世界以及你经历的很多事情。这时,你才真正是坚不可摧的。

If you clearly understand this point, the burdens on your mind will gradually lessen on their own, because you will discover that even these so-called burdens are empty and illusory. The reason they can torment you is entirely because you see them as very real. When you clearly understand that your own clingings and the things you cling to are all capriciously changing, and none of them can last forever, your mind will naturally relax, and relax again, and finally you will be as comfortable and pleased as if you are lying on the green grass in the warm sun. Then you will not feel that you are living such a fatiguing life, and you will be able to face this world and the things you go through, calmly taking things as the come. Then you will finally be truly solid and unbreakable.

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